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Lost.
In my thoughts.

Confused.
About my desires.

Selfish.
Striving for what I want.

Lonely.
In this world.

We all want to be heard,
But no one wants to listen.

We all want respect,
But don’t want to respect others.

We all want to be loved,
But don’t want to love.

—-
Maybe I just need a hug or maybe I should give up and move to the Emo Farm

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In our society it is very common to be greeted with a “how are you?” This has to be one of my biggest pet-peeves. I think it has to do with the fact that 95.7% of the time when people ask me how I am that’s all they are doing is just asking, hoping I’ll respond with a “I’m good, thanks” I can’t help to think to myself though. Why do we say we are good, fine, great, or dandy instead why don’t we tell the truth. Now, maybe the truth is you are fine but i suppose maybe it’s my want for more information that makes me wonder WHY are you fine, WHAT makes you good. I often try to refrain from using the phrase how are you for this very reason.

So How are you?

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I am human, I make mistakes.
I have regrets, I need forgiveness.

I am human, I am selfish.
I expect to much, get too little.

I am human, I doubt.
I am loved, yet I want more.

I am human.

NOTE: This poem is still in the works expect it to be edited at a later date.

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As I get older I seam to become more and more forgetful. It used to be that I had to remember all my friends’ birthdays and make sure to get them cards and gifts. Well now it seams the older I get the more mine and there birthdays alike seam to be a lesser and lesser deal. It seams to me the older I get the less I want to get old. Well, Happy Birthday to everyone who’s birthday I’m gonna forget!

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Happy [late] 2008 everyone! This is my first blog of the New Year and I hope everyone who reads this had a good Holiday Season and a glorious start to this New Year. I hope to return to my regular blogging schedule soon! One thing I find interesting about the New Year is New Year’s resolution. It seams there are two types of people, those who make them and break them and those who used to make them but stopped because they knew they couldn’t be kept. I fall into the latter. However, I would encourage you to try your best to keep yours if you made one this year If not pick something and maybe it’s not a resolution just something you want to do and do it!

Digression:
I also recently read this article on 100 things we didn’t know last year. I find it entertaining and fun to read.

Digression 2:
I also find this song to describe our lives in here in America it’s written by John Reuben and is called Chapter One found on his CD boy vs. the Cynic.

The Boy Vs. The Cynic, Chapter one, page one.
I’ll start from the top…
I’ll embrace dreams again when I can breath again
And at that point I won’t be needing them
It became clear to me that I was fighting a war I couldn’t win
You don’t make it on your own merit
Only royalty inherits the kingdom
And that’s a system good intentions can’t help
Your courage is not good here so don’t try to excel
What a sad day when you realize nothing can change
The revolution didn’t leave you it never came
There will be no parades, no royal balls
Just long days topped off with last calls for alcohol
Go to sleep wake up and repeat the same routine
Smooth skin dressed with wrinkles and brown eyes
With dark rings and entertainers sing of extremes that don’t exist for you or me
When real life is reality TV no wonder our youth don’t believe in anything
It’s all a joke there are no heroes just those of us with high hopes
It’s just not that simple
I’m not trying to save it all I just want to create a ripple
And even if one individual is affected it’s monumental with an unusual perspective
That’s beautiful in essence traditional thinking won’t suggest this
Is life really that precious well yes it is
But there will be no celebrations or congratulations
No pat on the back just your mind intact
And the freedom to feel your heart beat at the speed of life
Go to sleep tonight knowing you did it right
And rest easy outside of a system that resents you for not doing what they expect you to do
Psychologically wear you down and then they make the suggestion that you get on a prescription to deal with your depression
Anxious lazy temperamental obese
That’s what money makers like to call a disease
And they’ll be looking for or creating new problems with profitable solutions
To solve them but you won’t get any better you’ll just come back for more
Until your medicine drawer is filled with unreliable cures
And that’s the way of the beast
And I can’t do nothing about it
I could shout it in a room that’s crowded but I doubt it’d make a difference
So ignorance will be my disguise cause 21st century America likes its witchcraft civilized
21st century America likes its witchcraft civilized

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